When I saw the prompt of the day-I immediately thought of ‘All By Myself’ by Celine Dion. Because I’m Canadian, I naturally know all the words. LITERALLY the first thing I did was passionately hit my chest and screeched my way to that top note in the line, ‘Don’t wanna be…all by myself…ANYMOOOOOOORE.’ I am glad that I was all by myself when I did that as I would have shattered ear drums as well as expectations.
Because the melody sounds quite dismal and sad, I think we often think that being alone is synonymous with unhappiness. If you don’t go out on Friday night to some trendy rooftop bar, and if you don’t post 100 photos posing with your pals on Instagram, then you aren’t living your ideal happy life. I’ll keep my $300 instead of spending it on overpriced drinks and cab fare, thanks.
There is definitely a stigma that is attached to being alone, and doing things alone. I am introverted and I have a time limit of how long I can be around other people, so I am actually relaxed and happy when I am alone. That’s not to say I don’t need social interaction with family and friends (I do) but not as much as someone else might. However, the idea that being alone is synonymous with being unhappy is absurd, and here’s why…
I remember telling a friend that I actually enjoy going to the movies alone, hiking alone, and going to dinner alone. She was shocked. She said she would never-because, ‘people would judge her.’ In that moment, I immediately felt sorry for her. I have done so many interesting things in my life-and if the stipulation was that I can only do them if someone else was present for fear of judgement, I wouldn’t have done ANY of them. How many things are you going to miss out on because you don’t want to do it alone? Nobody in this world has the power to create your happiness. You are the ONLY person who is capable of making you happy.
When there are no outside influences, and you’re not waiting around for anybody to think for you, make decisions for you, or judge you, you actually become more, ‘You.’ You become, ‘You-ier’ if you will. Your sense of self becomes more refined and defined as you cultivate passions and interests that make you happy. When you live your authentic ‘you-ier’ passionate self, people notice-and they are attracted to it. The irony in this is you will actually end up having more friends if you commit to some regular alone time.
So just this one time, Celine Dion is wrong-you should want to be by yourself sometimes. Regularly scheduled solitude is good for you.
I also have a YouTube channel where I rattle on about things on my mind. Come say hi and post a comment on my latest video! 🙂